2 weeks to go ... and I must say I'm starting to feel nervous. Quite nervous and a little panicky. For the simple fact of just starting over again. Having to figure out the specific needs and quirks of this new child, unravelling the mysteries of every 2 or 3 hour feedings, their sleep schedules, just-before-bed dream feeds, are they eating enough, why won't he/she sleep, what will calm this child down? We've got Henry figured out so well but those first 6 weeks with him were so hard for me. Mainly because I realize now he was starving, not able to take much from me breastfeeding. I was in tears most nights and we were at the hospital getting help from the nurses and the lactation consultants numerous times those first few weeks. And he would just cry and cry ... and not sleep.
I've been reading more and more lately various blogs and articles and online conversations regarding other Moms' questions for their newborns. Feeding struggles and sleep routine queries. And it just makes me nervous to be jumping into that again, really, any day now. I do know, though, that by whatever means it will all be ok and we'll figure each other out ... but oh, I'm just not ready! Not ready to shake up this wonderful constant predictable routine Henry and I have set together now. Not ready to be questioning everything I do. To feel frustrated and exhausted and overwhelmed and alone.
But then as I lie in bed having to pee again for the umpteenth time and feeling like I'm 90 years old with bad hips trying to get up off the mattress, I am gifted with another quick and insistent kick to my belly followed by a hand jab to my spleen ... and I think ... Oh, but I am very ready to meet YOU.
Nantucket {April 2026}
3 hours ago
4 comments:
Cass, thats so true - you've got me all teary thinking about how exciting it will be to meet this little one - those first few weeks are really hard, but they don't last forever and you will soon know this little one too and have a new routine worked out for BOTH of them together and it will be so worth it. I hope your last few weeks are comfortable for you and I can't wait to hear the news of this new one!
Cass, I so enjoy your blog, and have loved looking in on your first year with Henry. I don't comment often, but I am blessed and encouraged by you.
One thing I pray will be a help to you as you look forward to this little one's arrival and as you work your way through the first weeks is the knowledge that you, Sam and Henry ALL survived those first rough weeks and have made such happy times together. If there are challenges with this new little one (and really, each baby has its own unique set), the Lord will walk you through it once again. He is so faithful!
Praying for you as the time approaches.
It will be so good to meet that new little one! We're looking forward to it as well, even though it will only be in the virtual world for awhile.
Routine will come again, and it won't be long because you crave it and will make it happen! It will just look a bit different from the routine you already have.
God is faithful; I learn it more every day!
SO excited to meet baby Morgan!!!!!
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